She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
