Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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