I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
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