I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
