then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I have fence marks all over my body
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
