Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
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