My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
