I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
