no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
