I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
