the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
