I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
this will be a night to untag.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
