Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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