whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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