So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
