ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
