This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
did you just send me my own nude
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
