Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
