But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
