We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
