A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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