HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
