i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize
