found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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