I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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