I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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