That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
