You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
