it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
you had me at cake vodka
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
