well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Randomize
