we have officially lost it.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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