If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
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