I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
