he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
