Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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