Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
