Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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