its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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