Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
