Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
