im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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