Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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