I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Randomize
