Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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