I'll bet she douches with gravy.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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