you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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