i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
