I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
