Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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