Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
